Sega Na Lega

--
On the way home today, I lost my temper at a driver who was, in my view, driving like a jerk. I did the old, Masshole routine of tailgating, high-beams on. When she went to turn left, she slowed down to a complete stop and diagonally blocked the road. I laid on the horn, and a good deal of not-too-good words were exchanged, fingers punctuating the dialogue.
I felt really bad about it immediately after it ended. I had lost my temper yet again drove dangerously, endangered my wife's safety, beat on my nice, new car, and screamed like a nut-case. Shameful.
Why do I get so angry? Why do I feel so out of control sometimes? I swear that sometimes the stress I feel is so intolerable, it threatens to snap my fragile mental state. Work, school, commuting, isolation, culture shock, money worries - these all gang up on me in my head, and I feel like I'm going to lose it completely.
So, on my way back to campus this afterneoon, bearing my former angry state in mind, I took 3 Kava tablets and drove very leisurely back into town. In so doing, I discovered that when I force myself not to rush, I enjoy the drive more. When I get into a rush mentality, it makes me crazy. I start looking for asshole drivers and then I see them everywhere, and that just adds to my anger. I've got to stop rushing all the time. (Taking Kava, as a rule, might be the best thing for me as well.)
As I was cruising up Dole St., I saw two guys getting into a fist fight, having abandoned their cars in the middle of the street to do so. I am not the only one having a bad driver day. If I had not forced myself to calm down, I might have been in that fight, and that would be stupid.
This life is driving me mad, but I am stuck in it for the time being. Coping strategies are all I have at this point.
A trip off of this miniscule lava outpost would be ideal, so the plan is in the works.
Fiji was so easy. Sega na lega was the way to go. Seems like this place has nothing but lega.
Hyaa, Ekdam pagalaa jaghaa haii!

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