The Bostonian Abroad

A new year dawns sleepily for me, as I try to work out the kinks in my dinged-up resume and psyche. I'm trying to find work again - in the same field I've been in for years now, and I have had to do some work to deal with the trauma of the past 5 years. I have a miniscule form of PTSD, I think, because whenever I think of work or graduate school, I mentally and sometimes actually wince at the pain it still brings. I know I need to get past this, so I try to remind myself that this place is going to be as different from the old place as the old place was different from Boston. This has helped a bit, and I have polished up the ol' resume and even bought a fancy new laser printer to make me look spiffy, even if I feel like a failing phony. Here I am, 35 years old, with years of teaching and doctoral study under my belt, and yet I feel worthless and idiotic most of the time. Graduate school really knocked me around, especially the way I was treated by the faculty. I had t...

For the first time in years I actually have a bit of the ol' Christmas Spirit! The weather has turned cold, the leaves have fallen off the trees, and it gets dark early! How odd that I should appreciate something so much which is so mundane! And this over Hawaii no less! I got used to never-changing beauty, perfect weather every day, always leaving the windows open, day and night, 24/7. It became desperately monotonous and made the daily grind that much more difficult because it echoed the sameness of the sterile and generic office environment. So much has the spirit returned to me that I have recently put up Christmas lights, a large stocking on the front door, and smaller ones on the fireplace mantle! For the first time in my life I can imagine Santa, someone in whom I was never permitted to believe in the first place, coming down my wee chimney and through my fireplace, ready to leave presents under my tiny rosemary tree I bought at Home Depot. I'll even leave cookies...

Tessie, 'nuff said! 

Yesterday was a bad day. I got dressed up early in order to go down to the DMV and get my new driver's license. I had a long list of things I was going to accomplish that day, and, based on my achievements the day before, I was hoping to carry on the momentum. Alas, it was not to be. I arrived at the DMV and began to wait. And wait... After about 20 minutes, I began to appreciate the fact that we were given chairs instead of having to wait in a long line - like in Hawaii. I also began to fret that I might not have the requisite paperwork to get the Hawaii car registered here. I called Lorrie and asked her to get ready to fax something over in case it was needed. I was sure that this would be all that I would need and that I would be able to get what I wanted to get done. Nope. When I got called up a half hour later - not bad by DMV standards - I was told that I needed to have my wife present in order to change the registration because the car was in both our names. Damn. ...

After a few months of transitions, we are finally settling in at our new home. Thus far, it has been entirely pleasant to be here, and with each passing day, I feel that our decision to move here was the right one. Of course, this is, as always, a developing view as we have not yet begun to look for jobs. However, we have socialized a couple of times, and in these tentative socail interactions, we have felt welcome and accepted. It's amazing to me that in our short time here, we already feel more positivity and acceptance than we ever felt in our torturous five years in Hawaii. When people ask us why we left, or how we could ever think to leave such a beautiful place, I really feel guilty in having to tell them of all our problems there. It feels like I am ruining their idea of the place by throwing in our reality. At the same time, I feel a bit bad to speak ill of the place; isn't that funny!? Five years of unhappiness at virtually every aspect of that place save the we...

We arrived in Milan about four days ago and spent 24 hours there. The food was okay, but our take on the place was that it was dirty and crowded. We were quite happy to leave for our next destination: Firenze! Firenze, or Florence, is wonderful! It is much smaller, cleaner, more relaxed, and congenial. The food is excellent, and the sights are exquisite! We have eaten such delicious food that I can't even come close to describing it. Each morsel forced my eyes closed to better focus on all the flavour I was tasting. The wines that came with our meals were of a quality I had never known, and the desserts! I am surprised people are not fat! But then, with such quality, one does not feel the need for volume! We went on a wine tour recently with a guide from NJ, and we were the only ones on the tour! Such is the way in the off-season. We drove up and down little hills, on narrow streets, seeming to go in circles, but in the end, we found ourselves surrounded by colors seen on...

After 5 years of trying to like Hawaii and failing, we have finally gotten out of that terrible place. Sounds counter-intuitive to say it,"Hawaii sucks!" And those who have not lived there at the middle-class level or below it are never going to understand me when I say that Hawaii is a terrible place to live. I have written many times about it, so one can look over these previous posts to get a sense of the pain we suffered there, but still, those who refuse to believe that Hawaii could ever be miserable and hellish will forever say that I am insane or irretrievabley cynical. So be it. I tried to make friends there, and 99 percent of the locals would not allow it. I would try to smile in a friendly way and nod hello to strangers everywhere I went, but they always either ignored me entirely or gave me a cold, unmoving glance and not return any hint of friendliness. When I did make friends, it was with mainlanders like myself, who would always end up moving back to the mai...